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My model of progress was suboptimal
I used to believe that progress with insecurity looks like this—and it fucked me up:
Nov 7
•
Chris Lakin
108
8
10
Flirt like it’s predetermined
My mindset shifted from “Flirting to convince others to like me.” to “Flirting to discover who loves my relaxed self.”
Nov 2
•
Chris Lakin
109
3
16
“Wait, feelings are supposed to be IN THE BODY?”
Mentor: “…and how do you feel in your body about that?” Old me: “Wait, feelings are supposed to be IN THE BODY?”
Oct 29
•
Chris Lakin
141
7
11
One-shot Unlearning
Over a year ago I began an experiment: Could lifelong insecurities that resisted years of therapy, meditation, and other attempts be addressed via ~one…
Oct 25
•
Chris Lakin
94
3
9
Why we create our suffering
Locally optimal strategies
Oct 22
•
Chris Lakin
163
20
The bottlenecks hypothesis
How does therapy-resistant insecurity get unlearned?
Sep 6
•
Chris Lakin
127
7
14
Unlearning is Underrated
I used to have immense trouble with saying “No”, with being in conflict, with “accepting myself”, etc.—and now I don’t.
Aug 25
•
Chris Lakin
111
22
How I'd rewrite The Courage to be Disliked
I read The Courage to be Disliked 7+ times in four years.
Jul 23
•
Chris Lakin
120
10
20
aim *only* at things you want
Listen now | Max and Chris discuss how aiming at what you want gets you more of what you want — and how aiming at what you don’t want gets you more of…
Jun 6
•
Chris Lakin
and
Max Shen
28
1
3
6:38
“Flaky breakthroughs” pervade inner work — but almost no one tracks them
Has someone you know ever had a “breakthrough” from coaching, meditation, or psychedelics — only to later have it fade?
Jun 4
•
Chris Lakin
53
5
10
Happiness underneath
If we’re unhappy, things and experiences will make us happier… right?
Jun 3
•
Chris Lakin
50
10
9
Social anxiety isn't about being liked
There’s this popular idea that socially anxious folks are just dying to be liked.
May 16
•
Chris Lakin
356
14
51
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