Incentive Aligned: Resolve Your Lifelong Issue

Dec 28, 2024

Payment is forbidden until you feel genuinely satisfied.

I used to be anxious, romantically insecure, validating-seeking, etc… After outgrowing these symptoms, I wondered, “How this have been easier?”

I created better models of growth and now help founders, AI people, and highly agentic individuals resolve painful emotional issues, especially when years of other attempts fell short. Watch the videos below.

This service is offered on a 100% bounty basis: Payment is forbidden until you feel genuinely satisfied with lasting results. The goal: align financial incentives with desired outcomes.

Results bounty must be >$20k. I love helping people who are serious, but I receive extraordinary inbound and spend of most of my time doing R&D.

Update: incentive structure changing soon.

Schedule 10 min call

Questions? Twitter DM or email chris@chrislakin.com.

To become secure, unlearn ~500 triggers.

I teach how to unlearn insecurities. Detecting and defusing all ~500 triggers takes 20–60 hours. Some learn the skill in the first session and do the rest on their own.

You will feel the release of each trigger, and you’ll know why it’ll last.

For people who

Like my vibe
Have the “feel your feelings” skill
Are willing to peer into potentially intense and aversive emotions

By Chris Lakin

Why did this start?‎ ‎ ‎ |‎‎ ‎ Why BOUNTIES?‎ ‎ ‎ |‎ ‎ ‎ What’s Chris’s deal?

I Am Not A Therapist. (Ironically, I train therapists.) This service supports personal growth and professional development; it is not therapy or medical treatment. Confidentiality: I use shared information to improve practice; identifying details always remain confidential.

Testimonials

Testimonials are prohibited until months after the work.

A man at a prediction market conference had been stuck despite 8 years of therapy and 1 year of seeking “scary situations”. He only needed one session and I interviewed him six months later:

One of my new friends said, “You're so adventurous.” That shocked me… If you were to ask my high school friends that’s not a word they would use.

Every week I had some new ridiculous, fun, stupid project that I had others rallied around. It's exactly the stuff I kind of pictured doing but never really did.

Full interview:

A founder in SF had been stuck despite 2 years (120 hours) of IFS therapy, retreats, and hundreds of hours of meditation. After five sessions:

Previously, I would freeze up or feel anxious about how I should act. And now I think it's just feels much more like, oh, okay, here's somebody who I like. And I'm gonna just express however it is that I'm feeling in the moment. And I'm just having more fun.

Expressing attraction feels fun now.

—Full interview with timestamps.

A man had been stuck despite talk therapy, CBT, and IFS. After three sessions:

I used to get triggered by very small things that some of the people surrounding me would say or do… would incapacitate me for 48 hours, I would have to shut myself in my room. Now I just laugh…

—Full interview with timestamps.

A man had been stuck despite trying most of the tpot meditation advice:

In the days since my session with @ChrisChipMonk 3 weeks ago, I have had a deep change in posture, the resonance of my voice, my ability to stay in connection with others, and freedom of expression. It really has done wonders for my relationships and general confidence. Pretty much everyone I know has commented on the change. It really is remarkable how flexible and flimsy the borders of our neuroticism are when approached with the right tools. You can just overwrite a lot of it! It has made me unexpectedly optimistic about politics and so on. I ripped a muscle in my abdomen and have been in incredible physical pain the past week or so, and yet I have a fluorishing new relationship, I'm still able to be present and engaged. My mood is amazing considering the difficulties. The simplicity and ease of the technique gave me a deeper understanding of how 'fabricated' our sense of self really is, allowing a lot more insights into emptiness to come through in my practice. I've been successfully playing around with the borders of what feels 'fixed'. — https://x.com/kaleidosight/status/1847656199883223341

A founder in SF had previously tried 100s of hours of meditation and other coaching:
Periods of flow in everyday life are more frequent and reliable than ever.
I’m less nervous and tense around people.
A woman in tech had previously tried multiple therapists, countless books, and antidepressants:
I don't feel my life or my relationship is in crisis anymore. Things feel light and hopeful.
An engineer now experiences significantly more flow while working.
A man with a multi-decade porn addiction has not felt compelled in 6mo.
The 2% of my life feels more like 0.2% now. Only took 2–3 weeks, surprisingly.
A woman in SF tech is no longer a pushover!
Having engaged in 9+ years of coaching and therapy with varying levels of success, I’m probably one of the toughest clients
A founder had the first week in his life without procrastination.
An AI engineer can express more professional disagreements due to being less conflict avoidant.
A consultant no longer overcommits to stuff she doesn’t actually want to do.
An AI policy researcher is handling a new major role that he would’ve previously found overwhelming:
I can now say no to things that don't serve me.

…

Inspired by Predictive Processing

The approach draws from predictive processing (“the brain is a multi-layer prediction machine” —Scott Alexander), Alfred Adler, and independent research. The core idea is that almost all interpersonal issues can be resolved by unlearning locally optimal emotional insecurities: