Popular conceptions of “boundaries” don't make sense

I spent hundreds of hours thinking about boundaries, spoke to 100+ people, and ran two related AI safety workshops. All because every time I asked someone to explain how boundaries worked, the explanation didn’t make sense.

Update: This post has been replaced by multiple posts:

Setting boundaries can feel effortless

Claim #4 and #5 especially:

How I’d rewrite The Courage to be Disliked

I didn't have to avoid you; I was just insecure

Social anxiety isn't about being liked