I’d imagine that often the very emotional patterns you’re trying to unlearn are what prevent you from getting your life in order enough to build that financial runway in the first place.
> "But if you have anxiety while you’re broke and living with your parents, yea it’s probably protecting you and tbh somewhat risky to attempt to remove."
But couldn't that anxiety also be what's keeping you from taking responsibility for your life and moving out, precisely because doing so feels scary? 🤔
Internal and external bottlenecks can reinforce each other, and I think progress often happens on both fronts simultaneously.
Trying to get into meditation and struggling inadvertently helped me come to terms with my ADHD. I knew deep down I had it but was in denial, but getting over myself and getting meds was a game changer. Getting on the ADHD meds then slowly made me realize a bunch of those hyperactive symptoms were masking the fact that I am also a bit autistic. Solving one problem exposed another. I always felt like I was drowning at jobs that require a ton of social interaction because my brain is simply not optimized for it and forcing myself to do it anyhow just made me miserable. Turns out I am not as anxious and depressed when my nerves aren't on fire 24/7 from stress from living a life incompatible with my nervous systems needs. I also am about to do a sleep study because both my father and sister have sleep apnea and I probably do too, which is probably why I am exhausted all the time. I also can't think creatively when I am financially insecure which is very annoying. Whenever I have had a job I am good at that I can rely on to pay for all my needs my brain relaxes and starts planning for the future again. Otherwise I am in survival mode and it sucks. There's a lot in this article that resonates with me, to say the least.
I worked on meditation for 10 years. That is, almost every day, certainly during stressful times, I set a reminder to meditate, every day. Sometimes in the morning, but no, maybe the afternoon works? No maybe before bed?
I was told meditation was the way. For me, that was total and complete horseshit. And a relief not to have to meditate.
My life increased vastly, and I do sit way more with my feelings (without"meditating"),
But I am just convinced that on a deep level, I find meditation boring and practically I get more effect from looking out a window without doing anything else, going for a walk, laying on the couch without a phone.
Isn't defining a mental health issue as an external bottleneck a catch-22? Feel an overlap between both, and contradictions in addressing them as separate problems.
The problem with that view is that ignores learned-helplessness: sometimes external circunstances have changed enough for there to be an exit, but you do not see it or take it because the internal tells you there is none. Of course, if you still have objectively no exit, no amount of internal work will create it. But usually all ships float or sink together.
I’m dying finally a materialist view of self improvement
Highest impact post you’ve written Chris, most people have a long triage tree and they’re starting by trying to fix stuff too deep into it
lol cool thanks. i just wish i knew how to post this on lw without getting downvoted
LWers lack the Vitamin
I admire the honesty and clarity you have when defining the scope of your work, Chris.
This seems a bit oversimplified.
I’d imagine that often the very emotional patterns you’re trying to unlearn are what prevent you from getting your life in order enough to build that financial runway in the first place.
> "But if you have anxiety while you’re broke and living with your parents, yea it’s probably protecting you and tbh somewhat risky to attempt to remove."
But couldn't that anxiety also be what's keeping you from taking responsibility for your life and moving out, precisely because doing so feels scary? 🤔
Internal and external bottlenecks can reinforce each other, and I think progress often happens on both fronts simultaneously.
Trying to get into meditation and struggling inadvertently helped me come to terms with my ADHD. I knew deep down I had it but was in denial, but getting over myself and getting meds was a game changer. Getting on the ADHD meds then slowly made me realize a bunch of those hyperactive symptoms were masking the fact that I am also a bit autistic. Solving one problem exposed another. I always felt like I was drowning at jobs that require a ton of social interaction because my brain is simply not optimized for it and forcing myself to do it anyhow just made me miserable. Turns out I am not as anxious and depressed when my nerves aren't on fire 24/7 from stress from living a life incompatible with my nervous systems needs. I also am about to do a sleep study because both my father and sister have sleep apnea and I probably do too, which is probably why I am exhausted all the time. I also can't think creatively when I am financially insecure which is very annoying. Whenever I have had a job I am good at that I can rely on to pay for all my needs my brain relaxes and starts planning for the future again. Otherwise I am in survival mode and it sucks. There's a lot in this article that resonates with me, to say the least.
I worked on meditation for 10 years. That is, almost every day, certainly during stressful times, I set a reminder to meditate, every day. Sometimes in the morning, but no, maybe the afternoon works? No maybe before bed?
I was told meditation was the way. For me, that was total and complete horseshit. And a relief not to have to meditate.
My life increased vastly, and I do sit way more with my feelings (without"meditating"),
But I am just convinced that on a deep level, I find meditation boring and practically I get more effect from looking out a window without doing anything else, going for a walk, laying on the couch without a phone.
You don't have to meditate.
Isn't defining a mental health issue as an external bottleneck a catch-22? Feel an overlap between both, and contradictions in addressing them as separate problems.
https://x.com/chrislakin/status/2106884855086895139
The problem with that view is that ignores learned-helplessness: sometimes external circunstances have changed enough for there to be an exit, but you do not see it or take it because the internal tells you there is none. Of course, if you still have objectively no exit, no amount of internal work will create it. But usually all ships float or sink together.
Dharma Artha Kama Moksha baby lfg 🔥